Too Much Has Changed Posted by Happy Blogger , 9.10.12 at Tuesday, October 09, 2012, in

Wow. It has been too long.
I wish I could apologize, however I have my reasons.
Let's just say September was too much for too many reasons.
Vancouver, School, Vancouver, School.
I love most my classes. Music History is another story. I'm working on it though.
I love my contemporary poetry class. It probably helps that my teacher is strangely attractive.
I went and saw Kimbra at the Commodore Ballroom.
It was not a concert, but a real life fantasy for me.
I was so close I could see her sweat, and what appeared to be paint on her arms.
I was in a trance. I could not stop staring at her. I was so focused that I completely missed the lesbian girls have a falling out, and some drunk guy with a hat stealing one of the lesbians away.
The band that opened for her were incredible. The Stepkids have it going on. They really do.
The bass player stole my heart. His bass lines and grooves were too much to handle. I have never felt so inferior to a bass player ever. What a beautiful mess!
I like writing poetry.
Although I recognize most of it is fairly depressing.
They are just things. Thoughts going through my mind.
I enjoy being by myself and clearing my head, however the clarity can be scary.
I can't decide what I like better, being in a consistent state of fog or in a state of scary acceptance.

This was the most recent one I wrote. It's just my brain thinking too far ahead and being all hypothetical and what not. I don't know. I figured I would share. This is is a nice place.

Shocking
Petrified
Terrified, maybe
Abrupt like that kid in class that won't leave you alone. 
And how do you cope?
You don't
You wear the mask, like a wig on your bald head, pretending you are okay. 

I remember Kindergarten
I remember way back when we wore wigs for fun
I remember cheating off your social test
We were the only ones to get 100%
I wore the mask of your brilliance

You asked me if I could take it away
k(no)w I tried. 
I mean, who knows really?
We can ask Him all the questions
though there are few a little suggestions

Hard like a diamond pill
I can't even imagine swallowing
There is one this I do know, 
is the difference between giving up and letting go.

-Happy Blogger