April 21- Can you spell S-H-A-M? Posted by Happy Blogger , 29.4.11 at Friday, April 29, 2011, in

April 21st/11
Performance day today! So we get to the festivl, and concert band goes first, and they sounded quite good actually. Symphonic Band was next....Satiric actually went very well! Irish tune had some tuning problems but overall very emotional. My solo went really good in Shepherds and we were FLYING in the Ascension. The adjudicator told us he would keep this performance in his heart for ever. A guy also firstly made note to the amazing french horn section! woohoo. I videod Alyssa playing Kookaboura on cello, I'm very proud of her! Jazz Band went well. Boogie Stop was terrible on my behalf. I can usually solo if I just find high Bb and I can usually noodle, but guess who didn't find Bb.... Vocal Jazz was pretty funny, we all laughed at the end. We fell apart in Sing Sing Sing, but oh well. The festival was a sham. It seriously felt more like a talent show, and that opposd to earning something, we were given a 'pat on the back' and a 'thanks for coming to our country'. I hung out with Madison all day, we were pretty angsty. The introvert in me came out, and being around all these people almost made me sick. Kelby didn't wear proper shoes (ugh!) These women beside us sat down, got back up, and because the rows were so narrow, it was awkward and I dropped my camera and dented it, and it didn't work for a bit, but I fixed it now, no worries. Calgary Academy was here. What the ****, they can't even dance, seriously. When they performed at the end, I said "You came all the way to China FOR THAT?". We did a concert finale thing at the end. OMG the asian bands are amazing. They sounded proffesional even though they were Junior High-High school students who had only rehearsed for a month. It was so unorganized it was ridiculous. I feel just ugh about it. At lunch we got to take a tour around a school with chinese school. I walked off. I spoke some chinese (Hi, I'm Canadian), they appreciated the canadian gifts but I'm sure they were laughing at me. I visited with 2 students, Jane and Sumer who wre very nice and we asked alot of questions. Schools are MUCH different. The MC was a D-bag and was stoopid. Ughhhhhh. The food was sketchy.There were people behind glass windows wearing masks and full body suits, dishing food into trays. I felt like I was at a prison caf. I actually could barely stomach anything, and Madison and I were hungry all day. We were all given participation awards at the end of the night, and Wilson and I accepted the Bishop Carroll Jazz Band Award. At the end, a woman came up to me and said "You know, you really souldn't stick your tongue out when you're on stage!" I know I do it when I play bass, but I can't even tell when I'm doing it. ughhhhh peopl! Oh well, Tom made me smile when he fell in the pile of mud. I want to drink tea and breath and I want some GOD DAMN NOODLES! Apparently they don't have noodles in China or they don't ever serve it to us! Oh well, what a doy.

Back in Calgary when we were preparing for the festival, we were rehersaing so much, and practicing like crazy on our own, so to get there and have adjudicators that could only remark on our performance as opposed to the music we actually played. So it was a little frustrating when we all felt like the festival was sham. However, I give them slight props, since this was the first time they had an international music festival in Beijing. I mean, some people regretted all the effort we put in before China, however I feel that our performance we did that day was the best we had ever played as a group, and I was very appreciative of the fact that we got to even play at an internatioal level. I pretty much spent the day just frustrated regardles but I'll get over that. Our selections of songs we played were Satiric Dances by Dello Joio, Irish Tune of County Derry/Shepherds Hey by Percy Grainger and the Ascension by Robert W. Smith. Madison and Kelby are my fellow french horn mates, though on occasions Madison and I have our moments with Kelby. Our tour was pretty cool, they're school schedules are much more intense in China than in Canada. They usually work from 7-5:30. The bathroom in the school made the scariest noise I had ever heard, and I actually couldn't go into the bathroom without screaming and running back out the safety. By this point in time, I barely ate anything in Beijing, everything was so greasy and smothered in sauce. Oh well. It was a very long day at the festival and everyone was feeling angsty. But we wouldn't let a day like that ruin the trip now would we?

-Happy Blogger

April 20th- Today, I Became A Hero Posted by Happy Blogger , 28.4.11 at Thursday, April 28, 2011, in

April 20th
8:18 am So great sleep last night. Showered this morning, cut my ankle pretty bad shaving, oh well. Rachel & I sat with this asian couple for breakfast and we were trying to tell them we are going to the Great Wall today. So we pulled out our sheet and wewere working all our chinese magic (poor talking) and tried to explain ourselves. Turns out they were Korean, but hey, we tried. They were lovely and we thanked them for breakfast.
10:09 pm. Dude, Great Wall!!! we pulled up, and I almost teared. First we performed. Mr. Herard was conducting very fast, so that was an interesting adjustment. We sounded amazing, and while we played, you could look up and see the wall. Then we began to walk. It was extremely difficult and very hard, by the end we were very sweaty. The stairs were very uneven, old and always changing. It was an intense climb, but so worth all the work. We got to the very top, and for Koryn, screamed "I'm the King of the World". We took tons of pictures and sang the Lion Kinh. Going up hurt the thighs, but doing down hurt the calves. By the bottom all our legs were spasming (Majorly!). Lunch was sketchy, we had weird KFC, Lime lays chips, banana and EXTREMELY SKETCHY packaged sausage / hardboiled egg. Jade factory was so cool and unbelievable, some of the things/it is crazy and you almost can't believe it is hand carbed. I tought nice stuff 3 jade necklace, 1 jade pendant and a key chain for Haley. Supper was better than thought. it was the least sketchy, however I didn't try any of the meat. We saw hundreds of pigs in a caged truck, and it made me think of the holocaust and I felt sick to my stomach and I think I want to be a vegetarian. Hung out with Madison & Rachel and we vegged/ranted about life, but couple& testosterone buddies. Life is swell, and I smell of hard work & hero-ness. That's right, I conquered (a mear section) Great Wall, but still I feel exhilirated.
ps. Rachel spilled tea on my pants, and I have to learn to barter and can I say I love my sister and her fantastic selection of undergarments for China. Seriously, never more comfortable in my life.
love love love

My ankle actually bled alot. Curses! That "Korea" story is my favorite story to tell since I've gotten home. We were trying so hard to communicate, so I give us an A+ for effort! Each ensemble except the Jazz ensembles performed at the base of the Great Wall. It was pretty rad! It was about an hour and a half to climb up. For what ever reason, I thought it would be a good plan to be prepared at anytime, so I lugged a bag loaded with water, medicine, food, hat, sunscreen, toilet paper, camera and money weighing about 20 pounds up the great wall. It was hard, because you had to focus on each and every step you took because each one was different. You could have a step about 1inch tall, followed by one almost a foot tall. There were 5 or 6 strecthes to get to the top, and it was hard to tell when you were actually getting to the top, so I have several videos of me thinking I'm reaching the top. By the top, everyone was super red and sweaty, but oh well. Yes, I actually did scream "I am the king of the world" .We sand "I just can't wait to be king" on the top. Coming down was faster, however every muscle in your calves were spazzing, so you couldn't take any breaks, cause all you wanted to do was get down to sit on the bus. The food was pretty redundant, and most the restaurants were serving us the same type of food. The food we ate was pretty greasy, so it was getting harder and harder to stomach. Whilst on this trip, I noticed that there were two guys that tended to spend a lot of time hanging around me. I eventually labelled them my testosterone buddies... Confucious said that if you can climb the great wall, you will become a hero. So me and 150 other students became heros that day! How exhilarating.

-Happy Blogger

April 19th- Summer Palace, Forbidden City and Tianamen Square Posted by Happy Blogger , at Thursday, April 28, 2011, in

April 19th (Because we sort of skipped a day)

7:33 am I slept really well, Rachel didn't...stupid watch. I'm going to help her calm down. We boiled tons of water, because we feel very dehydrated. We a vegging now, and we have a great day ahead=] We listen to music....sooooooo soothing.
10:01 pm got back from an Amazing Day I can't even believe I was in the places I was. Summer Palace was stunning and it was a beautiful walk. The Pearl Factory was cool , and I bought some pearl earrings of each color. Lunch was so-so. Forbidden city was massive. (ps, we hit a taxi going there, our luck...) I found the place where at the end of the movie, Mulan ran up the stairs. Then we went to Tianament Square which was HUGE! and there was a huge picture of Chiarman Mao. I tried Duck for the first time ...mmm... and I gave Lyssie cookies in exchange for my French Horn. All is well, also very tired. Kung Fu show was crazy, I wish I was as graceful and strong. I tried not to fall asleep. Lots of photo bombing, and very unattractive photos. woot wooot.
<3

I bought a crappy watch for when I was in China so I knew what time it was. Unforunately I didn't really know how to work it, so every hour it would start beeping. Aparently I'm a deeper sleeper than Rachel, because I never heard it, yet it woke her up throughout the night...ooops... Rachel (my roomate) and I have been best friends for about 3 years. High School can be crazy stressful, so we decided that we would meditate when we were in China. You can't drink the water out of the tap in China, hence the tons of boiled water. I believe the soothing music was feist. Summer Palace is a Palace in Beijing where Dowager Empress Cixi used to live in the summer time. From the stories we heard, Cixi was a crazy person who was super powerful/manipulative. Before she became the empress, she ordered the previous empress who was a beautiful dancer to have her arms and legs cut off, and after said to her "dance for me now!". Anyways, it was beautiful and it started to feel like we were in China. We got to see what real pearls look like, and we learned how to tell the real from the fake. If they are real, they will produce a powder if rubbed together, and if they are not uniform shape, they are most likely real. So I bought 4 pairs, a white, rose pink, a lavender purple, and a charcoal color pair. Then we went to the Forbidden City, where the Emperor lived. It was unbelievable and breath taking. The buildings are so unique. I pointed out the Mulan thing, and my tour guide rolled his eyes as if it was the whitest thing I could have said. In China, the smarter and more accomplished you are in your education, the higher ranked you would become, that's why education is so important there. At the exit of the Forbidden City, there was 5 different bridges to get in, and the center one was only for the emperor. So naturally when I walked out, I walked down the center one. Once we were outside the Forbidden City, Tianamen Square was right across the street. It was huge. My counsellor who came on the trip mentioned the Tianamen Massacre. We had to 'shh' her, because in communist China, they deny that ever happened. Silly woman. For supper, we had Peking Duck. It was okay, but Duck is quite greasy- wasn't a true fan of Duck. Lyssie guarded my french horn on the trip, because I couldn't carry the french horn and the bass at the same time. Later we went to this Kung Fu show, and I sat at the very back and in the corner. It was really hard not to fall asleep, even as much as I wanted to stay awake. For whatever reason, it was a goal to see who could get the most unattractive photos of me. Let the face making begin!

-Happy Blogger

April 17th - EnRoute to Beijing Posted by Happy Blogger , at Thursday, April 28, 2011, in

CHINA TRIP 2011

April17th/2011
-Got up at 5:50 am, Uncle Pat picked me up at 6:50am. Off to the airport where our 9:10am flight was delayed until 11:00am. Our flight to Vancouver was short and sweet. I watched an episode of "Sherlock", that Neil recommended I watch. Because we were so delayed, we had to run (I skipped) to our plane leaving for China. I sat with Haley. For meals I ate chicken/pasta, beef/barley which tasted like crap and make my stomach nauseaed the entire flight. So I took a gravol which was dunny because I became 'loopy' very quickly. I fell asleep by Joanna, and made remarks with how much she looked like a big baby, and then I passed out. Then Alayna(?) reclined her chair in front of me, and I woke up abruptly, snorting and screaming that my head was squished, followed by I had triple vision in yellow, and I could have sworn there was a dog on the plane. I watched Blue Valentine, Dinner for Smucks, Comedy Central, Harry Potter 7. Landing in Beijing was cool, because it looked so "lego" likeand clumped into little sections. Once we landed, we took pictures, took a train, went for supper where I tried everything but the Duck. Hotel is beautiful, and Rachel and I are very much excited. We have been up for over 24 hours so we are very tired. Chaperone group is awesome.
"I DIG IT" <3
-I'm Done I'm tired.

The night before leaving, I thought it would be smart to stay up as late as I could, and get as little sleep so I could sleep on the planes. I forgot how hard it was to fall asleep on the planes. On our way to the International terminal, I seriously skipped the entire way, because I figured I wouldn't be getting any excercise for a while, and it would help me become tired. Haley and I kept a countdown on the plane, which seemed to be the longest 10 hour flight ever. Most the movies I listed I nodded off in. I had never really taken gravol in my life until that moment, and thank god I only took one. I was seriously trippin. It took a while for it to really sink in that we were in China. We were convinced that we had turned around at some point over the pacific, and that Bishop Carroll had pulled the biggest prank in history. The food was pretty decent, and at this point I was ready to jump in to the chinese cuisine and eager to try new stuff. We stayed at the Loong Palace Hotel and resort, which is considered a high class hotel in China. It took forever for us to get settled into our rooms, so we stood around in the lobby for a while. At this point we had been up for several hours, and we were soo over tired it was painful. Gabrielle said "I think about to loose it", and I said "What ever it is, I've already lost it". We were so delirious, and everything to us was hilarious, we started tearing up. There were huge marble statues of aquatic animals, and Alayna said "Look those are cool!", and I (half asleep) responded "I Dig it", so that's that reference. Once in the hotel, I seriously just passed out and I don't think I have ever slept better.

-Happy Blogger

Bishop Carroll Heads For China Posted by Happy Blogger , at Thursday, April 28, 2011, in

As a brief introduction, my high schools music program went to China for an international music festival in Beijing. We would be gone from April 17-26. While I was in China, I wrote a brief journal for each day. I figured I would post this, because why not? I'm going to organize it in a fashion where what I wrote in my journal that day will be in italics, and I will elaborate/explain later. Warning: I will copy exactly what I put down, and I was pretty jetlagged/tired when I wrote most of these.

Hope you enjoy!
-Happy Blogger

Opening Up: Session 1 Posted by Sad Blogger , 6.4.11 at Wednesday, April 06, 2011, in Labels: learning, vulnerability, vulnerable, writing

I have to make an unfortunate confession. The last two posts I've made were actually plagiarized. Oh my god, yes I know. The good news is they were plagiarized from myself. The bad news is that it indicates how uninspired I've been when it comes to my writing. Sure, content-wise they might still be as entertaining as they were when I posted them to Facebook close to two years ago. Sure, I may have added commentary or switched some words or even made some spelling corrections. The point, though, is that as much as I wanted to create something new and intriguing, I was more interested in the attention I might earn from a couple of anonymous readers and instead chose to recycle some crap I hammered out when I was still in high school. Technically one was from much further back.

I recently dropped in on my writing professor from last semester and our conversation briefly touched upon my ability as a writer and the changes I would have to make to become better. I was initially insulted when she suggested I hadn't learned anything from her class, but now I'm sort of bent on proving her wrong. I guess I'm one of those negative reinforcement types. I need to know I failed in order to want to try? When I was still in the class, she'd told me how much she wanted me to broaden my writing and try to grow beyond the style that I consistently sink back into. She still assures me that my style is excellent and understands that I stick to it because I know it will be successful. But I know that a great writer should be able to adapt to other styles.

The piece of advice she gave me that stood out the most was that I need to be more vulnerable. I don't know if admitting this counts as being vulnerable but here we go. I don't actually know what she meant. I looked up how to be vulnerable on Google and this is what I got:

• Acknowledge your feelings. Denying what we feel only fuels our fear of being vulnerable. 
• Let go of the fear of being vulnerable. 
• Know, feel and believe that whatever happens, even if we do get hurt, that we can not only handle it but that we will also get through it. 
• Misery loves company. So we should be around people who encourages us and allows us to feel good about ourselves. If we associate with people who are also fearful and are not being proactive in developing themselves, we will not grow out of our fears. 
• Accept and love ourselves for who we are and seek validation from within. 
• Let go and trust ourselves. That is all we need to do to be vulnerable. 

Obviously my initial reaction is that this mush is utter bullshit. To my knowledge, I have never ignored or denied my feelings. In my opinion, I'm an exceedingly open and emotive individual. I wear everything on my sleeve and typically pride myself on how quick I am to act on how I feel. I also don't believe that I fear getting hurt. In fact, when it comes to "sadness", I think that more often than not, I tend to thrive in misery. The last two points are completely useless as there's nobody on this planet that I love or trust more than myself.

So I continue to wander through this life without a clue as to how I can be more vulnerable. Share my story? Reveal my true feelings? Is opening up seriously all it will take? I suppose that's what this experience will be about.

But you didn't really expect to get the whole dish now, did you? I had to give you a little taste so you would come back and join me on this journey. Yes, "journey". I'm trying to stretch outside my style, remember?



Finally getting to the sad,
     -Sad Blogger

Tales of a Fourth Grade...Prodigy Posted by Sad Blogger , 5.4.11 at Tuesday, April 05, 2011, in

I've been clearing out my basement over the past few weeks and I've happened across all sorts of relics from my early childhood. There's this particular feeling that comes over you when you see and feel some toy or poster or book that used to be one of your very few worldly possessions. It's like a muscle memory or something that just pulls you back to the specific moments that your brain held on to and nostalgia washes over you in short bursts.


But the most fascinating antiquities that were stowed away in the dark all these years are the stories and journals entries that my mom saved from my stint in elementary school. So because each time I sign in to type up another of my inspiring blog posts I end up staring at the blinking cursor for twenty minutes, I've decided to share one of those gems of a story here. The following was scrawled across several pages with "Wednesday March 22, 2000" scribbled in the top right corner. It was adorned with the fantastic title: "No Name Story".


I was sitting in my basement watching an adventure show with my friend, Geoff. Instantly I jumped up and said "Geoff, did you ever hear of that 'lost treasure of Quambi'?"
"Yeah, I hear it's full of diamonds and other cool jewels." he replied.
"Let's go to the Quambi jungle and see if we can find it!" I said.
We agreed to meet at the dock the next day to take a boat to the jungle. The next morning found Geoff and I taking a speedboat out to the island. As we neared the shore, Geoff and I both cried out in unison, "This place is amazing!"
There were giant mountains with waterfalls running down on all sides, different colored flowers popping out in different places, all kinds of birds and animals. I slipped my camera out of my pocket and started shooting pictures of everything and in no time I had used up all the film. Soon we were on shore and looking for somewhere to stay, like a cave or...did I say cave? Well I just spotted one! "Geoff, see that cave over there?" I asked.
"Yeah, let's try it out," he replied.
As we got closer I saw two red circles glowing from inside...no, four red circles. As we got even closer I noticed that those "circles" weren't circles, they were eyes, the glowing red eyes of werewolves!
"Run!" I gasped.
We ran as fast as we could until we came to a space between two cliffs.
"There's no way out!" Geoff wailed.
"Yes there is," I replied.
Hanging over the space was a vine. I told Geoff to grab an and swing across. Geoff looked at the vine and then at me.
"I can't do it," Geoff whined.
"Fine, hold onto me and I'll swing across," I grumbled.
As we swung across, I heard two desperate howls and then a 'thump' as the two werewolves hit the ground.
"Whew!" I exclaimed as we reached the other side.
We kept walking for a bit longer until we came to a lake.
"How about we take a short swim?" Geoff suggested.
"Sure," I replied.
As I was starting to take off my shirt I heard sort of a rattling sound. I asked, 'Do you hear that, Geoff?"
"Probably just the wind," he replied.
"Whatever you say," I agreed.
Soon we were having fun racing each other, jumping off cliff ledges and zooming down tiny waterfalls. Then we got bored and decided to head on. As we were getting dressed I heard that rattling sound again. "I hear that rattling sound again," I commented, "I'm going to see what it is."
As I got closer I saw two beady little eyes and a tail, a tail that took up...the whole body. Wait a minute, I thought, oh-no! "SNAKE!" I screamed at the top of my lungs.
As the snake darted toward me, Geoff came through the bushes and said "Maybe it's just hungry."
"Oh yeah, right." I said calming down.
We walked around the jungle looking for berries or nuts, until we came to a giant banana tree. 
"Climb up it, and get a bunch of bananas," I told Geoff.
"Okay," he agreed.
When he got down we all had two bananas. Even the snake. Then we pressed on to the seek the treasure. Every night we got to know the snake even better, we even named it Hiss. One day Hiss saved my life: we were walking around, and I was walking backwards talking to Geoff about what we would do the next day.
"So Geoff, what do you want to do tomor...HELP!" I screamed as I suddenly fell backward into a pit of slimy stuff. Quicksand.
Quickly, Hiss slithered up a tree and hung on a branch so I could hold on and then the pulled me up. As I was climbing off the branch, Geoff said "That was amazing!" "But how are we going to get across?" He continued.
"Easy. The same way we escaped from the werewolves," I replied.
Soon we were on the other side with some help from Hiss. We found a place to sleep and went to sleep. The next morning I was awakened by the sound of a drum "Brummmm, brummmm!"
"What's that?" I asked.
"Sound like the Stampede Band," he replied. [here i have drawn an arrow pointing to a messy "that means Geoff"]
At that moment I found out what it was. It was a tribe of evil natives, and they were coming striaght for us! Then I felt a bang on my head and then I was knocked out cold.
I came-to a few hours after that, to find myself tied to a pole stuck in the ground. Suddenly I remember about Geoff and Hiss. "Geoff, Hiss, are you there?" I whispered.
I waited for a few seconds and then heard a rattling sound. It was Hiss. Next I saw him come out of the shrubbery. As he was biting away the ropes bound around my wrists and ankles I heard Geoff moan and saw him open his eyes. Then I heard footsteps. "Hurry up, Hiss!" I urged.
He finished quickly and that gave me enough time to undo Geoff's ropes and buzz off. We found our way to a lake to take a swim. At the lake was a waterfall and I found a tunnel beyond it that led to a cave that was filled with moss. I was awe-stricken. In that cave, was the "LOST TREASURE OF QUAMBI!"
"We found it at last!" I shouted with glee.
We found our way to the boat, threw the treasure inside and headed home.

When I got home the next day I quickly ran down to the basement to phone Geoff, but I couldn't make it. I was so exhausted that I had to have a snooze. So I did.
THE END. zzzzzzZZZZZZ!



As you can see, I was a shadow in my childhood of the brilliant tour de force I would grow up to be. Obviously my pacing left a fair amount to be desired, but it still does so we'll call that part of my style. Back then, my characters blinked through time inexplicably and now I get angry and wedge in a hasty conclusion for the sake of closure. And sure, I felt a little too obligated to describe who said what and how they said it. But goddamn do I wish I could remember the old school, "The next morning found us" transition. So here's that rushed outro I was talking about. Something about finding my inner child and learning from my youthful ambition. Yeah.


Fearing I never actually improved,
   -Sad Blogger

A Closer Look at Those Footprints Posted by Sad Blogger , 1.4.11 at Friday, April 01, 2011, in

One night a man had a dream. He dreamed he was walking along the beach with God. Across the sky flashed scenes from his life. For each scene he noticed two sets of footprints in the sand: one belonging to him, and the other to God. When the last scene of his life flashed before him, he looked back at the footprints in the sand. He noticed that many times along the path of his life there was only one set of footprints. He also noticed that it happened at the very lowest and saddest times in his life. This really bothered him and he questioned God about it:

"Hey God, so I've been looking at all these footprints here and I'm a little confused. When I signed up for this whole dealio, I was under the impression that you were supposed to be there like ALL the time. So how come now I'm looking at the footprints and at the lowest and most difficult points in my life, there's only one set of footprints? You were supposed to be there for me."

And God replied:

"Well...that was when I left to take care of the OTHER FUCKING SIX BILLION PEOPLE IN THE WORLD!! You selfish prick. Do you realize how many people die in a day? How many little kids scrape their knees? How many divorces go down? All the rape and the adultery and lying and cheating and murder and jaywalking and running red lights and homosexual relationships and masturbation and meat-eating and antisemitic jokes??? DO YOU REALIZE HOW MANY PEOPLE PRAY FOR ALL THAT CRAP? Like I'm going to wait on you hand and foot and carry your sorry ass around all the time. It's not just about you, Jeff. This thing is a two-way road, got it? If you're going to spring for the faith thing, you gotta do half the work. Yup, sorry you're just figuring it out, Dumbass. Now comb your hair and suck it up. Peace."


A little bit of insight,
   - Sad Blogger